Thoughts come and go. And just as time swiftly goes by, it sometimes takes your thoughts with it. It sometimes comes back, it sometimes don't. At certain times it flies by and fades away. And so thoughts, along with your feelings -- which most of the time are left unspoken -- when written down become an archive which when looked back to will serve as memories.. both good and bad.. So here is an archive of my thoughts.. and everything that goes with it. =)
28 December 2010
Comfort Zone
It’s been a while. It’s been a while since I last thought of you. It’s been a while since I last let the thought of you get to me. It’s been a while since I last allowed you to affect me this much. It’s been a while since you last held my hand, looked deep into my eyes and reached my soul, put your arms around my waist like it’s the first time, and touched my hair time and again, breathing deep into it.
It’s been a while. It’s been a while since I tried to forget how it all feels. It’s been a while and I thought I’ll never feel this way again. But, yes. I had to see you again after a long while to realize that I need a while to figure out that even after a while, it still feels the same. And a while has to pass for me to know that you feel the same.
It took me 1,818 days to comprehend that even after half a decade, the place you left is still yours. And it took me 2,001 days to understand that even when a lot of people have come in between during the 2,001 days, what we have been to each other will always remain as it is, no questions asked.
We’ve always been each other’s comfort zone and it always feels like home everytime. Your hand in mine, our eyes fixed on each other as we talk about what has been, what is, and how what we are now is a result of what we have been.
It’s always a favorite topic, how we started. How we ended has never been talked about because we both know deep down that there was no ending. Even when we have been with several other people in the 2,001 days, we both know that at the end of the day, we’ll still find comfort in each other.
I’ll never find comfort in another guy as much as I find comfort in you. The whirlwind situation we’ve been through proves the strength of our friendship even as time goes by. I may not say this often but, yes, you’re the most comfortable person I know. We’ve been with each other through the worst but we still see the persons in us beyond all that.
Had I been a guy, I’m sure I’d be you. And if you’d be a girl, you’d surely be me.
Your mind works just like mine and I don’t mind. I know how you think so I don’t have to keep on guessing. I know how to make you mad and how to pacify you after. And you know that all you have to do is hold my hand to make me forget I was mad at you for breaking my heart. We still know how to tease and appease even after all the time that we spent apart. It doesn’t matter that we’re not together anymore. All that matters is that we know that what we were to each other 2,001 days ago will still be same 2,001 days from now.
It always feels like home just having you right beside me. And even when we might not get back together for the rest of our lives, I don’t mind, I’ll still feel the same. We might not love each other as intensely as our puppy love had been but we both know that our infatuation has naturally grown into a beautiful friendship that lasts a lifetime.
And this I sincerely say to you: I hope for our kids to be as good friends as we are. So even if we don’t end up with each other, we’ll still find the comfort of knowing that what we have been has brought us into each other’s future without an ending. =)
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